May 2010
8 posts
finding happy now
i just shamelessly ate two hot dogs with a bit of ketchup, about to take a sip of my melted ice iced coffee, and smoke the rest of 2 butts i found in my cousin’s astray. i’m grateful for my life because i know i’ll be happier someday and i’ve been through the shittiest shit before and i know i’ll pull through.
but right now, i’m okay and i’m okay with...
welp
I’m happier in life. I smoke cigarettes like crazy, but that’s what I do when I’m lonely. I can actually go cold turkey, I just have sort of “fuck it” attitude right now which is okay because it doesn’t last too long. I lost a bit of weight, which is so amazing to me cus I’m not working out as hard as I should, mostly walking, drinking water instead of...
threw myself in the shower
after i got out i wanted to curl up in a ball and sob on the cold floor because of the strength it took to do just that. in a way i was proud of myself for not rotting in my bed longer than a day because that would’ve just been nasty. i wont let depression take over me. fine, i’m depressed since 1998. i’ll probably always feel the black cloud over me but i won’t let it kill...
don't read. it's depressing.
i’m heartbroken. haven’t eaten, i dont remember the last thing i ate. i can’t sleep. i smoke a lot of cigs. i’ll stop when my lungs hurt again.
my sister is married. everyone has a significant other. getting educated, making money. falling in love and making babies, moving into their own apartments. i’m here stuck in life watching everyone grow happier. i’m in...
April 2010
4 posts
I'm feeling like I'm sinking and nothing's there...
fuck you
seriously, we ended it. stop with your facebook nonsense. bye.
become a fan of shut the hell up.
March 2010
5 posts
Fuck feeling inadequate. Fuck laying in bed...
sabino:
iwantmybearsuit:
aprique:yerawizardharry:overdramatics:(via brokenmachine)
oh, love, how quickly you’ve turned to hate. i hate you, liar. making love to me, talking love to your pregnant ex from forever ago, having sex with 2 (maybe 3) of your friends on the low. going through changes with me, for what? you don’t love me. i need to love me.
sigh. no more, i’m good without love.
O my darling, O my darling
He makes me cum. No one but myself was able to. I watched his face in the mirror as he came. He held me so close to him. He is so beautiful I can’t stand it! It’s not just sex. I love this man so much. He is my equal. His love is something straight out of my dreams.
February 2010
2 posts
giarae:
Why the fuck do I do this to myself
hey, you, what’s up??? everything ok?
heart freakin broken
so yea
not dating anyone ever again. i’d rather be alone. i really mean that statement. i cried so much, and i can’t sleep because i’m in love and he wanted to just be friends.
going to start jogging as soon as my horrendous gut pain goes away. i really mean that too cus i lost 12 lbs from just walking, just 40 more to go and ill be good.
my mom has been lying up a storm. i...
January 2010
7 posts
i wish my ex bf
wouldn’t be in my dreams. i woke up so angry and sad. i really with that memory eraser from “eternal sunshine of the spotless mind” was real. i would erase him and the few other people i loved because they used me, never loved me only pretended to…
i’m so heartbroken. this is a year later. i’m damaged forever. i don’t even think about him for a reason...
ay dios mio
my sister is prego. smokes weed and cigs for two. took a shot of vodka for two. drank wine for two. is she fucking kiddddddddddddding? my mom is catering to her, and her boyfriend. i hate this with a passion. then she emails me on facebook to go downstairs and blow up the bed for her cus they’re in my room. yes, im grinding my teeth again, and yes, im about to start smoking cigs again. im...
Today I possibly saved a woman from being either...
staresdeadlierthanbullets:
Thank God.
I fucking hate the Bronx.
You are a hero <3 F the bx =(
December 2009
15 posts
sexdrugscocopuffs:
She hits the lights. This doesn’t seem quite fair. Despite everything he learned from his friends, he doesn’t feel so prepared
Sic Transit Gloria, good song :)
so much benadryl
I’m still up. so yea not like I don’t have a buncha things to do tomorrow. =[ arrrgh
i hear a song from another time, and fade...
asap
I want to be happy I want to be healthy I want not to suffer so much just to be aesthetically pleasing. I want to go back to school I want to fall madly in love with a true friend and him fall in love with me too I want to have amazing sex and feel comfortable enough to orgasm. I want to finish school and be proud. I want to be happy in the near future. Is this selfish? I will be.
sOOO
i guess I’m alive!!!!! yea
November 2009
2 posts
October 2009
7 posts
liliinthesky:
earthlaughsinflowers:
...
SUAVEMENTE
staresdeadlierthanbullets:
daamnndesiree:
(via karenmejia)
BESA ME
(ihopethatsspelledrightotherwiseilllooklikelessofapuertoricanthanialreadyam)
o m g this song never fails at getting stuck in my head!!! the only one
crying from happiness is as overwhelming as tears of sadness
this made my night
I broke down at the gym.
liliinthesky:
I was in the restroom for like thirty minutes just crying.
Then I was angry so I ran on the treadmill for a very long time.
I always cry in the gym. Been so emotional lately. that, and i got so fucking fat that it feels hopeless and such a hard struggle to better myself.
so
This is it. I’ve had it with not being independent. So with that said, I’m moving out by the end of this month. I’m very happy with my decision. 2 potential room mates have flaked on me already, so I’m going to rent a room with my 2 cats. I’m definitely going back to school and get on with my life already. I’m almost 24 years old. God, that sounds so awful but I...