i just shamelessly ate two hot dogs with a bit of ketchup, about to take a sip of my melted ice iced coffee, and smoke the rest of 2 butts i found in my cousin’s astray. i’m grateful for my life because i know i’ll be happier someday and i’ve been through the shittiest shit before and i know i’ll pull through.
but right now, i’m okay and i’m okay with that.
I decided to take some pictures as I was getting ready for work yesterday.
submitted by woahitsalyssa! check her out cause not many other people take photos like these while getting ready for work.
(via herekitty)
I’m happier in life. I smoke cigarettes like crazy, but that’s what I do when I’m lonely. I can actually go cold turkey, I just have sort of “fuck it” attitude right now which is okay because it doesn’t last too long. I lost a bit of weight, which is so amazing to me cus I’m not working out as hard as I should, mostly walking, drinking water instead of soda and portion control. I lost 2 inches off my waist, which leaves me at 34”
No anxiety or panic attacks lately.
Katy Purry. Meow.
after i got out i wanted to curl up in a ball and sob on the cold floor because of the strength it took to do just that. in a way i was proud of myself for not rotting in my bed longer than a day because that would’ve just been nasty. i wont let depression take over me. fine, i’m depressed since 1998. i’ll probably always feel the black cloud over me but i won’t let it kill me.
i’m heartbroken. haven’t eaten, i dont remember the last thing i ate. i can’t sleep. i smoke a lot of cigs. i’ll stop when my lungs hurt again.
my sister is married. everyone has a significant other. getting educated, making money. falling in love and making babies, moving into their own apartments. i’m here stuck in life watching everyone grow happier. i’m in my own hellhole, afraid to go outside alone. i cry when i’m completely alone. i don’t even want to listen to music. i honestly feel like there’s absolutely nothing to hold me back from offing myself. i don’t really speak anymore. ill feel better in a bit, just ….. God, please help.
seriously, we ended it. stop with your facebook nonsense. bye.
become a fan of shut the hell up.
everyatomofyouandeveryatomofme:
legitimate: My simple advice for anyone feeling a bit down lately.
oh, love, how quickly you’ve turned to hate. i hate you, liar. making love to me, talking love to your pregnant ex from forever ago, having sex with 2 (maybe 3) of your friends on the low. going through changes with me, for what? you don’t love me. i need to love me.
sigh. no more, i’m good without love.
